Self-sabotage as the cause of failure and unhappiness. Many times, fear and indecision paralyze us disguising themselves as rational arguments. In this sense, self-sabotage is a significant obstacle in our lives, both personally and professionally. Self-sabotage is the cause of our failures, and for this reason, we must do the work of getting rid of this bad habit.
What is self-sabotage?
Self-sabotage and all related behaviors are unconscious acts that appear at times and can make a great change in people’s lives, whatever the type. This kind of behavior does not allow people to achieve their objectives and goals optimally. In a simpler explanation, it is a kind of self-manipulation.
Self-sabotage aims to keep the person in a state of fantasy comfort. The person who is mired in this state thinks that everything seems easy, comfortable, and completely predictable. Many times, it is even used as a subconscious defense mechanism because people do not want to deal with problems, suffering, etc.
Why am I self-sabotaging?
There are a myriad of potential causes for self-sabotage. Considering these cases, it will be easier for the person to avoid them and thus more easily achieve what they set out to do. These causes can be:
– Having trouble prioritizing goals.
– Lack of self-control.
– Lack of motivation or high pressure during childhood.
– Not knowing what you want to achieve.
– Low self-confidence
– Believing you don’t deserve to get the success you want.
– Following the objectives or goals that others set and that do not motivate you.
– Being afraid of failing or making mistakes.
– Being afraid to step out of your own comfort zone or risk doing new things.
– Having problems on a personal/mental level.
– Being afraid of not exceeding the expectations that others have for you.
Each of these beliefs and symptoms can appear in your mind completely unexpectedly and you must learn to deal with them, to prevent them from leading you to failure. Thanks to these kinds of thoughts, most people are self-conscious about fulfilling their dreams.
Self-sabotage manifests all those aspects that the person cannot accept about themself, all those beliefs based on fear. Over time, by not being confronted, it has gained weight and power within them.
Therefore, these obsessive thinking and harmful behaviors are only a symptom of something deep within the thought that needs to be examined. Although many times delving into these thoughts is not pleasant, Doing a personal analysis can allow you to grow, advance, and learn to deal with any kind of situations or obstacles that come your way.
Self-sabotage has some characteristic aspects that make it stand out in some situations of internal conflict. When a person unconsciously sabotages themself, they usually adopt this kind of attitude at some specific moments or situations in their life.
Normally, self-sabotage occurs when people have an obligation to take on important responsibilities, make decisions that can change their lives, when they do not feel comfortable somewhere, etc. For this reason, self-sabotage is recognized as the cause of our failures.
Some of the most common manifestations among people who sabotage themselves are:
– Intense fear
– Feeling of lack of control.
In this sense, we can realize that it is completely normal and understandable for the person who experiences these kinds of manifestations to undergo some changes in their life. The point is that people who do not sabotage themselves avoid paying attention to these kinds of thoughts that are so contradictory and of little benefit to our future.
The main difference between people who sabotage themselves and those who don’t is that those who do so are carried away by fear and believe that they will not succeed. In contrast, people who do not self-sabotage can leave behind this fear and overcome all the thoughts that generate insecurity.
We are all aware that fear is an emotion that cannot be avoided, but the most important thing is that, when you are already aware that you are afraid, you must prevent this empowerment from invading you, as it can prevent you from doing things to fulfill your dreams.
When people become aware of their fears and work to face and overcome them, they can achieve the success they so desire and enjoy the wonders that life has to offer.
Types of self-sabotage
There are four kinds of self-sabotage, which are classified according to the type of conduct the person engages in:
1. Not finishing things, self-sabotage as the cause of failure
In these cases, the person starts many challenges or projects that then end up leaving halfway through or even abandoning. Usually, the person dedicates many hours of work and effort and then gives up when they are about to achieve it.
In theory, if the person who exhibits this type of behavior does not finish their projects, then they avoid the possibility of failing or making mistakes, of not living up to the demands and expectations, etc. In short, they should not assume any kind of responsibility.
However, what really happens is that they will never be aware of their potential. At the same time, they will perceive themself as a mediocre person and without competence.
2. Procrastination, self-sabotage as the cause of failure
It consists of the habit of postponing or delaying those activities that the person must attend to, replacing them with other less significant or simpler and more attractive.
This is a very common habit in the population and the reasons for carrying it out vary. One of the probable causes is that the person does not like the task that must be done. This is one of the most common reasons among people who work in the professional field. For this reason, these people also feel fear when they present the result of the completion of the task.
In this way, if the person postpones completing the task and does not invest all the necessary efforts and resources, they will have a justification if it does not turn out as they expected. In other words, if the person dedicates all their time and effort to achieve something and still does not achieve it, it will reveal their supposed incompetence. Therefore, if they do not make an effort, this will serve as an excuse for failure.
3. Perfectionism, self-sabotage as the cause of failure
Perfectionism is the perfect excuse for never finishing a task. Many people hide behind perfectionism so as not to have the need to advance further with a project or task so that others do not notice that they are not really interested in doing the task.
Either the person thinks that since they cannot do something perfectly, they will not do it directly or that they avoid finishing the project through constant revisions and changes.
4. Excuses, self-sabotage as the cause of failure
In addition to all the above, people can find millions of excuses to sabotage themselves and avoid the progress they need to be successful. However, it must be taken into account that some excuses are genuine, such as people who do not have the resources to carry out certain tasks or projects, who do not have enough money to make important investments, etc.
Failure due to self-sabotage consists of a kind of ‘programmed failure,’ where one part of the self wants to do something, and another opposes it, leading to failure. These types of people seek a state of comfort without risks but without satisfaction or important decisions.
Definitely, self-sabotage is the cause of our failures. We must all learn to deal with these obstacles that limit us and do not allow us to achieve the success we desire. Now that you know everything about self-sabotage, you can change your habits and generate strategies that allow you to overcome this type of behavior.