Complaints: discover how many complaints delay you in achieving your dreams. Sometimes it seems that humans naturally complain, but most people don’t know that complaints seriously affect the achievement of your dreams and goals.
A complaining person is less likely to fulfill their dreams than a person who avoids complaints. For this reason, people must avoid complaining and take actions that lead them to fulfill their dreams more easily.
In this article, you will learn how complaints hold you back from fulfilling your dreams.
But first, what does it mean to complain?
A Complaint is an expression that denotes annoyance, disgust, or pain. When a person or living being receives a blow or is physically or morally attacked, this gives an immediate complaint to repel and avoid the damage.
A complaint can be expressed in many ways. Orally, it presents characteristics of anger, where the words used can be offensive or express pain for the damage that is the reason for the complaint. They can also be written. It is common in government entities or institutions where complaints and protests are issued for the breach of any pact or clause.
What are the characteristics of a person who complains a lot?
There are many motives, purposes, and reasons for a person to complain excessively. Some may complain to get attention or establish a topic of conversation.
The complaint is to free yourself from your regrets, from your adverse, bitter, or pessimistic situation in life; however, it fails. This mechanism is like a vicious circle. It affects your worldview, stamina, and mood.
Some believe that this behavior is often a reflection of the person’s thinking errors that, in turn, affect the perception of their environment. It is not necessarily a negative attitude, but a misinterpretation of the situations or events surrounding them and which they have to face every day.
Some of these people have grown up in families that also complain about everything and do so as part of a lifestyle. These people reflect dissatisfaction and some frustration with themselves. They reach a saturation point where they can’t deal with them every day anymore, so they complain.
To some extent, you might think that by complaining, you will solve something or seek the attention and compassion of other people. Also, seeing everything in a negative light becomes a habit to the point that the person does it unconsciously. You do not realize that you are a complaining person.
We have all known people who complain about everything in an unjustified way. There are mental disorders associated with people who complain of constant pain or concerns about their health.
From the psychological point of view, they fall into somatization disorders. However, people who complain about everyday matters or nonsense respond to other unsolved problems, such as frustrations, low self-esteem, insecurities, among others.
Why do people complain so much?
- Dissatisfaction: They do not enjoy life. They see almost everything ugly, normal, pulling badly, bland or criticizable.
- Intolerance and lack of acceptance of reality: They do not accept that things happen in life that we dislike, and when that happens, they experience it badly.
- Having too many thoughts of black or white: If something bad happens, life is worthless. If someone does something wrong, they do everything wrong, etc.
- Habit: By inheritance, by imitating family or partner models, or as later learning, they have learned to focus more on the negative and express what they feel at all times to “feel better.”
- Out of envy: They compare themselves with those who feel that they win, with more handsome, better social relationships, a better partner, better jobs, a better family, better whatever. The result: they are always below, life continues to mistreat them.
- Egocentricity and lack of empathy: “Me, me, me…. Others can suffer, but me? Why me?”
- As a manipulation mechanism: By complaining, they get attention, and make another feel guilty and win out of the situation.
- Lack of gratitude: They connect with the bad, they focus on everything that they dislike, but at the same time, they spend little or no time being grateful for what they like in life.
What are the consequences of complaining so much?
Apart from anchoring yourself in the negative, it prevents you from looking for solutions. Normally, people with a tendency to complain are not very decisive. They see problems in the solutions and rarely remedy what bothers them. If you continually complain about your boss, but you can’t help it, what good is it for you? If your job does not make you happy, complaining is useless.
You must find solutions: either fix the situation that you dislike within your job or change the job. The complaint only achieves:
Make things look worse than they are
When someone complains, they only focus on what is wrong. They ignore anything else. Although what is wrong is only 20% and the remaining 80% is right, it looks negative. They ignore the positive. When you spend the day complaining and talking about the bad, you end up seeing things worse than they are.
You risk it becoming a habit, how complaints delay you
The more you focus on the negative, the more difficult it becomes to see the bright side of things, and the further you move away from a positive mindset. Our habits define and guide us, so we should be very careful about what habits we choose.
You end up having what you focus on, how complaints delay you
It is what psychologists call confirmation bias: it is a tendency to interpret new information in a way that confirms one’s preconceptions and ignores information that contradicts our beliefs. Therefore, if you focus on the negative, you will choose the information that gives you the why everything is wrong, and you will stop seeing the information that tells you otherwise.
Lead others to a complaint, how complaints delay you
Normally the speech of a person who complains generates in the listener this tendency to protest, creating a climate of palpable emotional discomfort. If your environment complains, you get intoxicated by that tendency and focus your attention on negative things. You end up believing their complaints and making them yours.
Generates a feeling of helplessness
In an environment of continuous complaint, one ends up thinking that there is no solution, that nothing can be done to change things, that whatever you do, everything will continue to be bad or worse.
Complaint kills innovation, how complaints delay you
A person who complains is the first to fire against an innovative idea. Creativity and complaint are two opposite things, or one or the other occurs, but you will not see them together.
Attract negative people, how complaints delay you
Complaining attracts negative people. Any optimistic person will be seen as unrealistic or naïve.
Create unhealthy relationships, how complaints delay you
People who complain together unite against the world and feed each other to remain negative. Any positive idea will be frowned upon. In the end, they end up bonding with each other and forming “closed groups” of negative feedback.
Complaint and pessimism are two sides of the same coin
The complaint focuses you on the negative, leading you to pessimism, to see only the problem of each issue, without ever thinking about the solutions. Those who are pessimistic believe that thinking about the worst will be more prepared when they arrive, but what they do not know is that the optimist enjoys life more, and when the problem comes, they focus on the solution, having absolute confidence that by doing it, it will work.
How can I stop complaining?
Here are some strategies that can help you not complain so much:
- Identify if you are complaining and why or what you are doing it for.
- To detect whether it is a complaint, look at the tone in which you speak. When we report or tell what happens to us, we speak normally, and when we complain, the tone of voice is more muted, sad, critical, angry or angry, etc.
- Detect what issues you complain about (homework, health, others, your work, criticizing others, etc.)
- Be brief on complaints and extend yourself to talking and communicating neutral or positive aspects, such as current news, the weather, vacations, trips, books, meals, shopping, etc.
- Learn or improve the way you speak. Train social and communication skills to express your life’s negative aspects adequately without becoming an ongoing complaint.
- Express, but don’t complain.
Complaining will not help you achieve your goals and achieve your dreams, so eliminate this bad habit from your life. Now that you know how complaints delay you from fulfilling your dreams, you can practice the best strategies to eliminate this habit.